Thursday, December 14, 2006
Quizzical
Warning, long and rambling, but feel free to take the quizzes we give each other and tell me your score.


Thérèse says:
VJ sneezes Britishally.
Just FYI.

Jonny Opinion says:
Oh, thanks.
Conversation is so much more rewarding when you don't follow what the other person is saying.

Sarah Smile says:
It's true.
I do.

Jonny Opinion says:
How do you sneeze Britishly?

Sarah Smile says:
I'm not sure.
It's just that I think Britishly now.

Jonny Opinion says:
OK then. Here's a test.
On which side of the pennines are you more likely to be asked if you want scraps with your fish and chips?

Sarah Smile says:
*sharpens two #2 pencils*
The left side. The top left.

Jonny Opinion says:
No.

Sarah Smile says:
Damn.

Jonny Opinion says:
2. What are scraps?

Sarah Smile says:
Scraps.

Jonny Opinion says:
Yes, but no.

Sarah Smile says:
I think britishly now, so that's what I call them.
Scraps are scraps.

Jonny Opinion says:
3. What city do "brummies" come from?
OK, a point for question 2.

Sarah Smile says:
Brummies come from their mother's uteruses. Do we have to go over this again?

Jonny Opinion says:
Wrong. 4. If someone in Manchester asked you if you were a red or a blue, what would they be wanting to know?

Sarah Smile says:
What team I root for?

Jonny Opinion says:
Yes, sort of.
Half a point.
erm....
5....

Thérèse says:
Who?

Jonny Opinion says:
Good question. 5. Who?

Sarah Smile says:
The one standing between four and six.

Jonny Opinion says:
Yes.

Sarah Smile says:
See, I used logic on that one.

Jonny Opinion says:
6. If something is described as "the dog's bollocks", is that a good thing, or a bad thing?

Sarah Smile says:
Depends on whether or not that someone is a British person or a british dog.

Jonny Opinion says:
No.
I'm sorry, but you don't pass.

Sarah Smile says:
Well, I still think you're a fat bastard.
*crosses fingers and hopes she used that correctly*

Jonny Opinion says:
Um, sort of.

Sarah Smile says:
Ok.
Whew.

Jonny Opinion says:
If you think I am a fat bastard.

Sarah Smile says:
Damn it.

Jonny Opinion says:
hahahahaha

Sarah Smile says:
That wine commercial said it was a 'cheeky british phrase meaning whoppingly good.'

Jonny Opinion says:
No, that's completely wrong.

Sarah Smile says:
Oops.
Sorry about that.

Jonny Opinion says:
But I love it that there's people being told that

Sarah Smile says:
*giggle*

Jonny Opinion says:
I'm going to tell Americans that too from now on.

Sarah Smile says:
Come to think of it, that's hilarious.

Jonny Opinion says:
Test me on how American I am.

Thérèse says:
I want to be tested after this!
Test me on being American, AND being British.

Jonny Opinion says:
OK.

Thérèse says:
Yes. Yes!

Jonny Opinion says:
I'll test you as VJ tests me.
1. What time do pubs normally close at night?

Sarah Smile says:
Hmmmmm. Can I test you on how Californian you are?

Jonny Opinion says:
Sure.

Thérèse says:
Pubs do not close at night, they close in the morning.
Trick quesiton.

Jonny Opinion says:
Wrong. 11pm
2. Explain the offside rule.

Sarah Smile says:
What height does the surf report give, on average this time of year, in the mornings?

Jonny Opinion says:
5 miles.

Sarah Smile says:
No, 3 feet.

Jonny Opinion says:
close.

Thérèse says:
Anyone offside is not permitted to interfere.
it's the rule.

Jonny Opinion says:
No.
3. What is a public school?

Thérèse says:
A school that any citizen of the appropriate age may attend.

Jonny Opinion says:
No.

Thérèse says:
Or, where you go to get a sub-par education.

Jonny Opinion says:
A public school is a private school.

Thérèse says:
How do you figure?

Jonny Opinion says:
It's true.

Thérèse says:
Okay, very good. Next question.

Jonny Opinion says:
4. The capital of the Isle of Mann is called "Douglas". True or false.
?

Thérèse says:
I would love it if that were true.

Sarah Smile says:
Which of the following can your vegan neighbor eat? Carne asada, tostada al pastor or tacos papas?

Jonny Opinion says:
What's your answer?

Thérèse says:
True.

Jonny Opinion says:
Correct.

Jonny Opinion says:
Tostada al pastor.

Sarah Smile says:
No.
Tacos papas.

Jonny Opinion says:
Bugger.

Thérèse says:
Next question.

Jonny Opinion says:
5. Is the Prime Minister a member of the House of Commons or the House of Lords?

Sarah Smile says:
Which of the following is NOT a border town. Tijuana, San Ysidro or Santa Clara?

Thérèse says:
Both.

Jonny Opinion says:
Santa Clara.

Thérèse says:
San Ysidro.

Jonny Opinion says:
No, Rez.

Sarah Smile says:
Correct, Jonny.

Thérèse says:
Damn.

Jonny Opinion says:
YES!

Thérèse says:
I'd make a crappy Brit.

Jonny Opinion says:
I got one right!

Thérèse says:
Okay, time to test your canadian knowledge thenl

Jonny Opinion says:
Yes, you fail too.
Sorry.

Thérèse says:
1. How many time zones are there in Canada?

Jonny Opinion says:
Alright.
Nine.
Oh hang on, I thought you meant provinces.
five time zones.

Sarah Smile says:
Where is Chinatown located? In San Francisco, Los Angeles or San Diego?

Jonny Opinion says:
San Francisco.

Thérèse says:
Los Angeles

Sarah Smile says:
Trick question, it's in both SF and LA. So half right.

Thérèse says:
HA! We were right together, Jonnykins.
Correct. Five time zones.

Sarah Smile says:
What state route travels up the coast?

Jonny Opinion says:
Do I have to say a number?

Thérèse says:
2. What exactly is a toque, and how is it pronouced?

Sarah Smile says:
Yes, Jonny, a number.

Jonny Opinion says:
It's pronounced "tok" and it's a type of fish found in Quebec.
Number 80

Thérèse says:
(alternate spellings: touque, tuque)
Incorrect. Veaj, would you like to give it a shot?

Sarah Smile says:
No, state route 1.

Jonny Opinion says:
Pants.

Thérèse says:
A tuque, pronounced "too-k", is a hat.

Jonny Opinion says:
Fish, hat. Same thing.

Thérèse says:
3. How many seasons has Canada, and what are they?

Sarah Smile says:
I-80 actually runs across the states east to west, ending in the Bay Area.
Tell me what city is the hub of the Bay Area?

Jonny Opinion says:
San Francisco.

Sarah Smile says:
Correct.

Jonny Opinion says:
Yes!

Sarah Smile says:
Explain the phrase "Hang Ten."

Jonny Opinion says:
Something to do with surfing.

Sarah Smile says:
Yes, that's true, but it refers specifically to a surfing move.
While riding a wave, if you walk up the board to the veryveryvery front and hang your ten toes off the front, you are hanging ten.

Thérèse says:
ha!
that's awesome.
can you surf?
do you surf?

Sarah Smile says:
No, I don't actually.

Thérèse says:
really??
but... you're californian.
i thought everyone knew how to surf there.

Sarah Smile says:
But it's so part of our culture that even though I don't surf, I know how.

Thérèse says:
i mean... i'm not good, and i don't play on any sort of league, but i know how to play hocke.... oh okay.

Sarah Smile says:
Did you know they have classes to teach your dog to surf?

Thérèse says:
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAA
you're kidding.

Sarah Smile says:
Nope.
I love this state.

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3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Today I've discovered that I am 1/3 Brittish, 1/3 Canadian and 1/3 Calafornian.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

i kept yelling out the answers... i have a toque.

i can see the pennines from my English's balcony. they are quite pretty.

offside is a lengthy explanation! but isn't it basically when too many of the opposing team are near the goal before the ball has crossed the mid-line. mmmm my english is the goal keeper so i need to learn the rules for footy.

dogs bollocks is a very good thing.

scraps... i think it's bread. white bread maybe with some butter, so you can make a chip butty. mmmmm... double up on carbs.

did i get any right? oh i got like all the california questions right of course!

Blogger Sarah Smile said...

A gold star for each of you.

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