To clarify my remarks in the church foyer, here is the long version.
I know you're confused by what you hear around you about sex. I know what you hear from even our very liberal church and what you hear from your friends, it doesn't match up, not even a little.
The timeline, that seemed to confuse you most, and no wonder. Your friends say oral sex is as casual as a handshake, adults tell you no nakedness until you're married.
There are two systems, it would seem, polar opposites. Although, and this probably doesn't surprise you much, the people that profess each extreme most often live in a more middle ground sort of way.
So kiddo, I'm gonna take a unique stand here. I'm not gonna tell you what to do.
See, kid, the consequences of your actions, whether I choose them, whether you choose them, whether anyone else chooses them, are gonna be on you.
So you might as well pick 'em for yourself.
There are no rules in life. Only consequences.
And the most beautiful thing about growing up is freedom.
Make your own set of rules.
I will tell you anything you want to know, about the likely consequences of various actions, so you can do whatever is most likely to bring about the life you want.
You've grown into one of the kindest and most perceptive teenage boys I know, and oddly enough I don't worry about you much. Well, kinda a ton, and kinda not at all. Does that make sense? I worry that the world may not always be kind to you, but I don't worry that you'll be reckless or unkind.
And when in doubt, just surround yourself with the wisest and kindest people you can find. Hard to go wrong then.
P.S. I love you, kid.
I know you're confused by what you hear around you about sex. I know what you hear from even our very liberal church and what you hear from your friends, it doesn't match up, not even a little.
The timeline, that seemed to confuse you most, and no wonder. Your friends say oral sex is as casual as a handshake, adults tell you no nakedness until you're married.
There are two systems, it would seem, polar opposites. Although, and this probably doesn't surprise you much, the people that profess each extreme most often live in a more middle ground sort of way.
So kiddo, I'm gonna take a unique stand here. I'm not gonna tell you what to do.
See, kid, the consequences of your actions, whether I choose them, whether you choose them, whether anyone else chooses them, are gonna be on you.
So you might as well pick 'em for yourself.
There are no rules in life. Only consequences.
And the most beautiful thing about growing up is freedom.
Make your own set of rules.
I will tell you anything you want to know, about the likely consequences of various actions, so you can do whatever is most likely to bring about the life you want.
You've grown into one of the kindest and most perceptive teenage boys I know, and oddly enough I don't worry about you much. Well, kinda a ton, and kinda not at all. Does that make sense? I worry that the world may not always be kind to you, but I don't worry that you'll be reckless or unkind.
And when in doubt, just surround yourself with the wisest and kindest people you can find. Hard to go wrong then.
P.S. I love you, kid.
2 Comments:
Hi..
I've read your blog a fair few times but haven't commented. Just popped back and read down to this entry.. it's lush and very sweet.. and true!
Someone once told me decisions are all about conscience.. if your conscience is still cclear then it's okay.
Anyway the only reason i didn't read further is cuz it's midnight and i need sleep before work so tata.. oh and because your boobs are distracting me!!!!
You come up with some of the most obvious and profound things sometimes. I have never looked at life this way or at least never put it in these terms.
PS. We would love to have you grace Bakersfield with your presence.
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