Thanks for the Hate Mail.

"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."
Matthew 5:11-12

Ashiedu, thanks for your rude and un-christlike comment. No, really, I do mean it. It serves me two very useful purposes. It give an exact example of what I mean when I say, "there's no hate like the self-righteous, hypocritical hate of an arrogant christian". Also, it gives me the perfectly timed chance to post my testimony, which is what this blog has been building too since last Aug.

Now, Ashiedu, this post may contain words like 'prostitute', so if that offends you, you might want to avoid reading the rest of this post. You might also want to avoid the books of Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges, 2 Chronicles, Proverbs, Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, Hosea, Amos, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, 1 Corinthians, Hebrews, James, and Revelation. Perhaps your avoidance of the book of Matthew, which tells of Mary Magdelene, a prostitute who finds redemption in Jesus, explains how you also missed this verse. I'm just going out on a limb, here, by assuming you'd prefer that my readers and I not judge you on the fact that you have weird granny porn on your blog.
Is the word 'harlot' ok, or do I need to avoid that as well? What about whore?

And I will answer you directly. YES Ashiedu, God and faith matter very much to me, a woman that once dated a prostitute. They also happened to matter to Jadon. Perhaps you thought God was only a God of the shiny, happy people? Perhaps you think God didn't create them as well? Perhaps you think they exist in another dimension from, clean, socially approved little you? Perhaps you think they just are not offered the same deal of salvation as the rest of us? What sin am I guilty of that you are not?
Am I not equally entitled to an audience with the Father?
Perhaps not in YOUR faith, Ashiedu, but mine works a little differently, thank God. And your implication that I had somehow passed beyond the need, knowledge or love of God is just about the MOST offensive thing I could think to say to someone. Your comment was hurtful to me.
However, it leads perfectly into my story. And to all of you who read this, this is as personal as it get for me. And when you hear this, please don't also hear in your head all the religious crap that's been spouted by many other christians. Please, just hear me. I hope that I've developed a sort of rapport with most of my readers right now, and I feel like I'm personally telling you each this story.

Some background on my religous background. My father is a Jew who was raised in the LDS (Latter Day Saints) church, and my mother is a part Jew who was raised by alcoholics. They both converted to christianity after their marriage, but unfortuanatly, I think they really only acknowledge themselves as authority in their lives, and worship no god but themselves.
I grew up with a skewed perspective of christianity, mostly because I saw that most christians were hypocritical and fearful. I went to church on and off as a child, but found the christians to be the biggest stumbling block to my own faith.

It wasn't until I hit my own personal rock bottom that I found God. I've chronicled my unhappy childhood in several previous posts. I was in desparate need of someone to love me.
I ran into an old childhood friend of mine, who invited me to go to her church with her. I remember thinking sadly, "I have nothing better to do." How right I was. There was nothing better I could have done for myself.
For the first time I met christians that weren't unkind, mournful, or just plain stupid.
I met Jeff, who would show up at my apartment every week, and say, "Come on, lets go. You need this."
I met Brent, who treated me like I was worth something. Once, on Fathers Day, after my own father had blown me off and treated me like shit, Brent was two hours late to meet his own father because he sat in a resturant booth and listen to me sob and handed me napkins and made me feel loved.
I met Eric, who loved me enough to tell me when I was an idiot.
I met Dana, who made me feel useful, like I had something to offer.
I met Devin, who always listened.
I met Mavi, who just plain ole' cared.
I met God. In the form of Love. And Wisdom. And Peace. Perfect Peace.
I went from being a lost, broken little girl, to being a beloved child of the Creator.
I have no fear now. What can harm me?
I have purpose now. I know why I'm here.
I have an adopted family now. On that is everything a family should be.
Do you know what it feels like to be loved from the inside out?
I do.
I feel like I won the lotto, got my dream job, and fell in love.
There is such a thing as truth, and it does set you free, and it is free.
IT MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD.