Thursday, March 03, 2005
".............an equality of wills I finally understand........."
On Stripping Bark from Myself (for Jane, who said trees die from it)
By Alice Walker

because women are expected to keep silent about
their close escapes I will not keep silent
and if I am destroyed (naked tree!) someone will please
mark the spot
where I fall and know I could not live
silent in my own lies
hearing their "how nice she is!"
whose adoration of the retouched image
I so despise.

No. I am finished with living
for what my mother believes
for what my brother and father defend
for what my lover elevates
for what my sister, blushing, denies or rushes
to embrace.

I find my own
small person
a standing self
against the world
an equality of wills
I finally understand.

Besides:

My struggle was always against
an inner darkness: I carry within myself
the only known keys
to my death - to unlock life, or close it shut
forever. A woman who loves wood grains, the color yellow
nd the sun, I am happy to fight
all outside murderers
as I see I must.


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